Dogs will be dogs.

So, after lovingly filling crates and beds with plush and expensive pillows of puffyness for the puppies to curl up on...because, of course, they want to be comfy...

I come into the kitchen to find this:



I'm thinking, "What, did he miss the mark?"

Sweet girl.

Darling little Leah Gaddes...so precious.

Rare photo op.

Happy birthday to my lovely mom...she looks more vibrant and happy every year.

A little brown box.

I walked down the hall with a one dollar bill I had snatched out of my wallet seconds before. I neared the brown pastry box that sat under the sign that read “Donut Club” just outside Patricia’s office.

I had removed myself from the Friday morning donut club over 6 months ago in attempts to eat healthier and save the fat. But this was my second week coming into Patricia’s office and begging for the gooey goodness that was a chocolate covered twist. It was sinfully addicting with coffee.

I arrived at her doorway, snapped open my dollar bill and tried not to look her in the eye.

“Now WHY is it all of the sudden you need a donut each week?”

Me, guilt-ridden, “I don’t Knooooow. It’s just so gooood.”

“Well, you just need to get yourself some counseling - cuz I’m gonna take your money like a drug dealer.”

Tears of Frustration.

Excerpt from an email to a friend in Nashville:

"I had a really emotional conversation happen yesterday. A cut to the chase would be to say that I left work so angry after a light-hearted conversation that struck a deep personal chord. After work - I'm walking to my car with tears streaming down my cheeks and I was just mad. I was skipping around in my head about where to place the blame of why I was left feeling entirely unappreciated, underutilized, misplaced and undervalued at my job/company. As I finally reached my car, the long walk being the price one pays for parking in the shade, I wiped away my tears, opened my car door and just stood there staring at my leather driver's seat. I said out loud, "I'm just so angry. How did I get here?"

Then I got in - thoughts flooded over me... "It's your fault you're angry. YOU chose this job. These people [in the conversation] chose this as their career. They fit here. You don't. This isn't where you belong. This is not your passion. You aren't using your greatest talents. Choose differently."

With a swipe of my badge, the gate lifted and I pulled out of the parking lot. Immediately, I reached for my cell and called my friend Derek. He's a contractor and runs his own company. I said "hello", asked about his new born baby girl and then...dove in. I asked to do a bit of interning with him to learn the ins and outs of managing sub-contractors on rehab jobs. "What's your goal?" he asked. I described my desire to buy properties in Nashville, move in, fix up and rent them out - repeat. He's got tons of experience and said he'd be happy to introduce me to his current project - the building of his home here in Pasadena. I'll also be learning QuickBooks, which is becoming a must for minor accounting in the Executive assistant world.

I hung up after agreeing to burn a CD of pictures I took of his new baby girl and realized the anger was gone. Frustration, gone. I felt un-trapped. I felt like I had taken a step toward my future and I can't wait to get started. I can't wait to take everything I've learned working in 5 industries for 9 years and FLOURISH with them. I felt calm.

I really believe in Christian Existentialism - but along with that - I vacillate between quantifying my actions as patient and allowing for God's timing and opportunity, and that of simply taking whatever comes. I want to stay self-aware and pursue a significant life - AND CAREER - with genuine purpose and tenacity!"



by the way, this is Derek and his first baby - Leah.